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February 13, 2007
Unspeakable shit "Who can tell what's going to rile you up," said a friend recently, and it's true that in the midst of Darfur, peak oil, and ...
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Index of past entries

02-13-2007 Stop comparing things to punk rock
12-31-2006 But we climb the stairs everyday
12-28-2006 Accidentally Famous Dullard Best Known for Pardoning Crook Healed Nation, Nation Told by Media
11-07-2006 Down for the Dem ladies
10-03-2006 Why you don't want to watch a DVD with me after I've smoked marijuana, which I regularly get from Alfred Hoffington, of 8722 18th Ave NE, Seattle, WA, 98103
08-20-2006 Does your trash can need batteries?
08-06-2006 Four generalizations about New Yorkers
05-21-2006 Muriel Spark
04-22-2006 Maya Lin: Don't touch the particle board
03-26-2006 My version of bible education
03-08-2006 Dental surgery with the oldies
02-16-2006 Junkie brother in China
02-02-2006 True, shameful story
01-02-2006 Rough start to the year
12-26-2005 That Narnia movie
10-31-2005 Plamegate metaphor of the day, from Tim Dempsey
09-17-2005 Another question and follow-up question from my daughter
09-01-2005 Real American hero
08-24-2005 This just happened
08-18-2005 Morning bus tale
08-01-2005 A question, and a follow-up question, from my five-year-old daughter
07-25-2005 A biker who hates bikers
07-11-2005 Great news for Star Wars fans
06-28-2005 The invaluableness of gay eyewear
06-16-2005 Viva Le Robbie Fulks
06-09-2005 Angry Dale Chihuly dealers
05-26-2005 WTF is an up or down vote?
05-18-2005 Sweet Isabella Carbonell
04-25-2005 MoMA and the Mob
04-05-2005 The world mourns. Not.
04-04-2005 Dream Bracelet to the rescue
03-27-2005 Like miniature metal anuses
03-22-2005 Inmate Funds Booking Envelope
03-14-2005 Some very short reviews
03-07-2005 I dated a crackhead: A story with no moral
02-28-2005 It Don't Mean a Thing and other hated standards
02-21-2005 Inspiring/depressing George Clinton sighting
02-14-2005 Morning conversation
02-07-2005 The first rung on the ladder of death
01-13-2005 Flaying the croissant
01-11-2005 Snow
12-20-2004 Scientific proof that New Yorker cartoons are not funny
12-13-2004 Extra-horrible rat tale
12-06-2004 What we really think about at work
11-28-2004 Election day cat story
11-19-2004 Not this time, Martin Selig
11-03-2004 Great idea
10-18-2004 Spooky princess story
10-11-2004 Loving Puffy
10-06-2004 Your lesbian gay daughter who is a gay lesbian homosexual and also is your daughter
10-02-2004 Free Pillow
09-27-2004 Citizen Cope is a dirty hippie. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
09-20-2004 Men's Golden Supreme
09-15-2004 A funny picture
09-06-2004 A stirring, and completely true tale of revenge
08-30-2004 The worst shorts I ever saw
08-22-2004 In Japan, everything is art except the art
08-15-2004 A terrific place to throw up
07-06-2004 My wallet is super-charged for family fun
06-25-2004 Roving correspondent Tim Dempsey shares a disturbing tale of fatherhood
06-23-2004 Some thoughts on the funeral of Ray Charles
06-22-2004 The idiot theory of Seattle friendliness
06-21-2004 Some things I am truly sorry I did
06-14-2004 Embarrassing things people wrote about Ray Charles
06-07-2004 Let us now suck Reagan's dick
06-03-2004 I believe the children are our future--and that's because I'm lazy
05-31-2004 The new library vs. my brain
05-19-2004 The mini-pancake dilemma
05-08-2004 I heart symbol Ben Kweller
05-03-2004 Amongst the notes to himself is one that reads INCREASE MORALE
04-27-2004 Boxing rules, dude
04-18-2004 One less little black hole
04-13-2004 Henderson the Rain King vs. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
04-09-2004 Did somebody say vision quest?
04-07-2004 The snapshot of Markos' cock
04-04-2004 The joy of seeing strangers argue
03-19-2004 The greatest--or at the very least, the most beautiful--bar of soap in the world
03-16-2004 The worst sentence in the history of the New Yorker?
03-11-2004 Tim (The Man Who Knows Cars Like You Know Pussy) dips his enormous man-tool in a vat of ink and authors a treatise about work boots
03-08-2004 The Paul Robeson Stamp
02-09-2004 Have a weapon, make a weapon
01-07-2004 Steps I am taking to not become a bore
12-31-2003 Gino Vanelli and Daisy Miller
09-22-2003 Jokes my daughter tells
09-19-2003 The King of Karaoke
08-25-2003 Ugly, drunken rants about various NPR programs
08-19-2003 Three occasions of being mistaken for a racist, in order of increasing drama
08-02-2003 Which bugs should die? Which should not? By The Man Who Knows Cars Like You Know Pussy
07-21-2003 An important message about the refrigerator magnet situation
06-20-2003 Summary of that new Matrix movie
06-09-2003 And now a few more words from Felix, channeling Alton Brown (host of the Food Channel program Good Eats) via William Burroughs
05-13-2003 Felix talks about food from the old country
04-30-2003 A picture of the guy from Counting Crowes
04-21-2003 Working at home
03-27-2003 More hate mail
03-24-2003 War and Elizabeth Smart
02-26-2003 War and cheese
02-24-2003 The Loser’s Guide to Las Vegas
02-19-2003 The silent chamber
02-18-2003 Otis Redding
02-14-2003 Fashion hero
01-22-2003 A suggestion to write about IKEA
01-20-2003 My trip to Japan
01-13-2003 I, reactionary cracker
01-08-2003 Extra words that add no meaning
12-23-2002 A newspaper clipping banned from the kitchen at work
12-19-2002 The random candle metaphor
12-10-2002 Yet more words of wisdom from The Man Who Knows Cars Like You Know Pussy
12-04-2002 The stupid rhyming judge
12-01-2002 The nicest comment ever
11-12-2002 Some more words from The Man Who Knows Cars Like You Know Pussy
11-08-2002 Marijuana and restaurants
10-28-2002 The death of Paul Wellstone
10-01-2002 My dad's response to a scientific explanation of the Zen rock garden Ryoanji
09-23-2002 O'Malley sucking
09-09-2002 Hate mail round-up
08-26-2002 Some entries that just didn't work out
08-12-2002 Apologies
08-02-2002 Three features of The Gospel According to Mark that make it my favorite
07-31-2002 The Friday Hammer?
07-26-2002 Sorry
07-25-2002 Hopefully
07-24-2002 Self-esteem propaganda for children
07-23-2002 Kuan-yin and cancer
07-22-2002 A conversation so appalling, you'll think I made it up (but I didn't)
07-19-2002 What is the funniest number?
07-18-2002 Dublin bad, Belfast good
07-16-2002 From Plantation to Ghetto
07-15-2002 God bless you, Chip Kidd
07-12-2002 The four worst teasers from Salon
07-11-2002 Fantasy Baseball
07-10-2002 Three people I overheard talking about stuff
07-09-2002 Pedantic humor
07-08-2002 Battle of the escape-from-the-ghetto memoirs
07-03-2002 The truly troubling questions about Ernie and Bert have nothing to do with gayness
07-02-2002 Seattle gets race wrong (again)
07-01-2002 Celebrities I waited on
06-28-2002 Ask the man who knows cars like you know pussy
06-27-2002 Surely not *the* Mr. Anti-Literacy?
06-26-2002 The Tom Waits Report
06-25-2002 Learning the N-word
06-24-2002 The 1982 hit single, Up Where We Belong
06-14-2002 The best thing I ever saw
06-13-2002 Two cheers for Blackface Vaudeville
06-12-2002 Bowie vs. Moby
06-11-2002 Rocker Dude and Sheepish Grin
06-10-2002 Critic-speak
06-07-2002 The Jungle Book
06-06-2002 Blowing the lid off Green Eggs and Ham
06-05-2002 Eight pictures
06-04-2002 Love + fear + guilt = parenthood
06-03-2002 The real Shaggy
05-31-2002 Being an egg boy
05-30-2002 Cocktails on the beach, 1946
05-29-2002 Bad design kills you slowly
05-22-2002 Talking about race
05-21-2002 Local artists: pathetic or inspiring?
05-17-2002 Excerpt of a letter from my godmother
05-16-2002 Alcohol and Parenting
05-15-2002 The bikeless rider
05-14-2002 Cops, contractors, and coffee
05-13-2002 A survey of artists who draw comics, with irritating little comments about each one
05-10-2002 Three things
05-09-2002 So you want some personal information?
05-08-2002 The white-hot-glare to-do list
05-07-2002 Betrayed by Elvis Costello and Raffi
05-06-2002 The Flaming Penis
05-03-2002 Perilous Gifts
05-02-2002 Crazy Andy
05-01-2002 I will leave my wife and child. I will quit my job and become a bicycle messenger.
04-30-2002 Seattle's Poster Mafia
04-29-2002 A tale of two detective novels
04-26-2002 A list of words we will never use
04-25-2002 You call that an explanation of how telephones work?
04-24-2002 I read a book by Mark Fuhrman
04-23-2002 Letter to a karaoke host
04-22-2002 Today's article on Elizabeth Jameson
04-19-2002 Crackheads vs. car antennas
04-18-2002 Suicide of a co-worker
04-17-2002 Chevy Chase washed up in my mind
04-12-2002 Gillian Welch vs. Kristin Hersh
04-11-2002 Anti-graffiti screed with twist ending
04-10-2002 How I came to have a white trash home
04-09-2002 A crazy thing that happened circa 1992
04-08-2002 Area Man Convinced The Onion Is Sending Him Secret Messages
04-05-2002 Report from a man who attended Shaq's 30th birthday party
04-04-2002 The result of seeing a film in junior high, felt many years later
04-03-2002 Advice from Mr. Real Estate himself
04-02-2002 The two-headed Dear Abby monster
04-01-2002 The art of course packs
03-29-2002 The truth about xtreme dudes
03-28-2002 Are indie films ruining our appreciation of life's whimsical moments?
03-27-2002 My inability to hate Kerouac
03-26-2002 The wonderful gayness of firemen
03-25-2002 Reading to a two-year-old
03-22-2002 Hydraulic fluid and mildewy plywood
03-21-2002 Numero Uno
03-21-2002 More hate mail